Tuesday, April 17, 2018

The Path Of Most Resistance



….”this is why I don’t trust doctors”
…. “If she did that terrible before what makes you think she’s going to be a good doctor”
…. “Nigger”

A few weeks ago I watched the internet destroy a young black woman who decided to share the story about her not so perfect journey into medical school. She talked about her not so perfect GPA in college, her lack of research, her mediocre MCAT and all the people who told her she probably wouldn’t make it. Despite all this, she expressed with a sense of pride, now currently being a third year student in medicine. To her surprise, or maybe not, the reactions she received in her comments were largely less than supportive. People from all across the country questioning how great of a doctor she would be because of her journey, some using her struggle to justify their own issues with doctors and then the unfortunate ones who used this as a reason to justify their racism.

What many of these people fail to realize is that their comments in some ways represent so much of what produces a lack of diversity in the medical system. A 2014 study published by the AAMC showed that blacks and African Americans made up 4% of the populations of physicians. Even more alarming, the same AAMC report states that in 2014 they were less black male applicants to medical school than in 1978.  Although these numbers have been increasing since 2014, in 2016, black Americans still made up less than 10% of medical school applicants. With these numbers in mind, its hard not to beg the question, why aren’t there more black doctors?  Looking at that thread I started to remember why.

Like the brave student who made that post, my journey into medical school wasn’t easy or typical. I struggled with certain science classes, my first pass at the MCAT was by no means great and they were those that told me that I wouldn’t be where I am now, that I didn’t have what it takes to be a doctor. Thinking of my own journey that day as I sat in the cafeteria of the hospital reading the comments on her post, I started to think about how so many of those comments resonate with pre-medical and medical students of color. For many pre-medical and medical students of color, becoming a doctor  appears to be the path of most resistance. In addition to the lack of available financial and academic resources many students of color will have to learn how to navigate in a new culture, all while still holding on to their identity and beliefs without being stereotyped as the angry or sensitive student of color. In a generation where everyone has a voice we still sometimes lose and compromise ours in the hopes that it will someday benefit the patient who looks like us. Those thoughts in my mind, it becomes pretty obvious to me how it easy it is to lose not only yourself but your confidence in this journey. Even more scary must be finding the self confidence to proud of how far you've come and having your self-doubts reinforced by 100s of strangers.

Thinking about her journey and how much it reflects with mine I wanted to take the opportunity to say thank you for having the confidence to do what I couldn't. This probably won't reach a lot of people, but to the few it does and to the students of color continuing to climb that hill, please know that they are few that can do what you're done and have done.  In my opinion what will make you a great doctor is your determination despite your struggles, to keep fighting to succeed in a world with few who look like you because of the good that it may do for the patient who looks like you. And to the student who made that post I am beyond proud of you sis, you truly are an amazing woman.